Tuesday, 7 February 2012

Long distance relationships

Me and Chris, Bournemouth, one year together

The topic was drawn to my attention when Jade wrote abeautiful post about her long-distance relationship. It really got me thinking about my relationship and how lucky I am to have Chris near.
Although I’m constantly reminded of it now, due to my best friends boyfriend being in the Army. I’ve been living with Chris for about a year and four months now, we see each other every single day, every morning when I wake up, he’s always staring back at me and it’s something I definitely take for granted.

It hasn’t always been this way though, when I got together with Chris in February 2009, I always knew that in the October he’d be off to University and I’d never envisaged how difficult being apart really would be.

We never had a conversation where we decided to stay together; I remember so many people’s stupid comments like “Oh, so you’re staying together” like it was some kind of conscious decision. I always knew I was going to give it a go; I was madly in love with him and was always going to give it a shot!

To be honest, I thought him living 20-minutes away was tough and I really was kidding myself. This whole long-distance relationship malarkey is not easy, not for the strongest of women, who pledge their independency. Having no one there to hug when you need him most. I’d never known jealousy and paranoia like it, especially as a girl Chris lived with had pledged her allegiance to split us up by the time Fresher’s was over.

All the hatred and horrible experiences, we made it through, and Chris and me will have been together 3 years on the 19th. It was not easy, so many times I nearly turned my back, I caused so much pain to Chris and myself through my insecurities and I shed bucket loads of tears but I have a lot to thank our long distance relationship for. That first year or so of our relationship was possibly the worst torture I've ever had. But when I look back, it was probably the most romantic time of our relationship. When you're apart you constantly remind each other, over Skype, calls, texts, letters, how much you love each other. Also constantly remembering how much you miss each other!

Now we live together we don't tell each other half as much or have heart-to-heart chats nowhere near as much as we used to. Mainly because that relationship that we lead in later life with our husbands or long-term partners, simply does not exist. I think if we hadn’t have had the time apart to grow and see what we meant to each other; we would not be in the position we’re in now.

I think what I'm saying is that it's true, absence makes the heart grow fonder, how can you love someone when you've never known what it's like to be without them!

Me & Chris July last year
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